Why I Love Space Marines

Why do I love Space Marines?

Because they’re just so awesome. I mean, look at them.

Why Space Marines are Awesome

Why do people always run away screaming when I arrive?

I mean, how can they not be utterly awesome? The pinnacle of human ingenuity, scientific progress (which, according to Calvin & Hobbes goes ‘Boink’) and the hope of mankind? They’re seven-foot tall post-human warrior monks (with a collective mental age of about 13). And they have chainswords. And bolters. And flamers. And so many other things far too delicious to mention. They also have jump packs, but I’ll not go there for fear that Aaron Dembski-Bowden will mock me. More.

They have power armour. Sometimes, they have power armour that isn’t all gaudy and garish. They have thumping great space-faring vessels that can destroy an entire planet from space. Just to be sure. They fight the enemies of the Imperium and put their lives on the line for the God Emperor of Mankind who sits around on his Golden Throne watching endless repeats of ‘Supermarket Sweep’.

Does anybody ever say ‘Hey there, Mr. Space Marine? Thanks, you know? Thanks a whole lot for all that you do for us.’ No. Nobody ever sends them cards at Christmas. Nobody ever justs stops them in the street and says ‘thank you’. Such ingratitude. Once upon a time, when the Primarchs still had common sense and their brains hadn’t turned into collective sludge, there were get-togethers and celebrations and all sorts of things. Now, they just zoom around the galaxy like super-human bob-a-jobbers.

Poor Space Marines.

And there’s such a variety of them! There’s the raucous Space Vikings Wolves with their pre-disposition to accidentally becoming raging beasts. Then there are the noble Blood Vampires Angels whose tempers tend to get the better of them. The Brujah White Scars. The Doozers Imperial Fists. Wait, wait, more pictures needed here:

Rogal Dorn

Hi, I'm Rogal Dorn. Of COURSE I do loft conversions.

Imperial Fists

Here are some Imperial Fists in their converted Rhino.

There’s Loyalist Marines. There are Chaos Marines, and they’re kick ass, yo. The caption says it all.

Chaos Space MarineI love Space Marines.

I love them because they’re super cool. And I get to write about them.

That’s awesome, man.

Advertisements

9 thoughts on “Why I Love Space Marines

  1. Phillip says:

    LOL 🙂

    Brilliant!

    Incidentally, Primarch Abnett has addressed the Viking problem by doing it properly!

  2. Schafe says:

    You never mentioned how big their hands are. Surely that’s the most attractive attribute of a space marine.

  3. RayeRaye says:

    I couldn’t have put it any better.

    ESPECIALLY THE DOOZERS IN THEIR RHINO. HAHAHA.

  4. Stuart says:

    Sarah…..Sarah……Sarah!

    You need to come up for some non GW Air!
    Not that I don’t agree that Space Marines are cool and I still love them in a 13 year old way…. but I am starting to worry about you sweety.

    Congratualtions on being found BTW. Loving your work in Hammer and Bolter.

    Love from Workshy.

  5. Mossy says:

    Very nicely put. That’s an excellent Crimson Fist, too–where’d you find it?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s